Some people say that the government should not put money on building theaters and sports stadiums. They should spend more money on medical care and education. Do you agree or disagree?
در این مقاله به تحلیل یک نمونه رایتینگ ایلتس می پردازیم.
It is a highly debatable issue whether the government should spend money on medicine and education rather than on theater and sports stadiums. In my opinion, all these things are
important for the people, and therefore the government should allocate equal resources for both.
در پاراگراف مقدمه،نویسنده به دو جمله پرداخته است. جمله اول به معرفی موضوع اختصاص دارد که ناتوانی نویسنده در آن مشخص است چون از عبارت کلیشه it is irrefutable that ... استفاده کرده است که مشخص است رایتینگ مکانیکی و غیر طبیعی ست. جمله دوم که نظر نویسنده میباشد جمله ی خوبی میباشد چون هم به سوال به طور کامل پاسخ میدهد و هم از کلمات سوال استفاده نشده است.
Basic medical care is very important for the general public. If people are healthy, there will be more productivity of work and the country will prosper as a whole. There are many people who live below the poverty line and it is the government’s responsibility that they should receive medical aid whenever needed. There are also the elderly who have paid taxes throughout their working life and now need good medical care.
Good education facilities are also the duty of the government. Today, there are a number of children from deprived backgrounds who get substandard education. They would definitely require a high quality of education if they are to succeed in later life. What is more, an educated society has less crime and violence and the country gets good recognition in the whole world if its people are educated. On the other hand, theaters and sports stadiums are equally essential for people. Art and entertainment is also a basic human need. Theatrical shows provide entertainment and at the same time preserve our culture and tradition. Our artists earn name and fame for our country. Sports stadiums, similarly, attract millions of spectators to watch matches every year. Many more millions watch games on television, read about them in newspapers, and discuss them with their friends. Therefore, we cannot say that these are unnecessary expenditures and therefore the government should ignore them.
پاراگراف دوم، سوم و چهارم به درستی با یک جمله شروع میشوند که main idea پاراگرافها میباشند. سپس با استفاده از دلیل و مثال نویسنده به نوشتن پاراگراف ها پرداخته است.به ربط دهنده ها دقت کنید. جملات به خوبی به هم وصل میشوند.
To put it in a nutshell, I pen down saying that, medicine and education are needs that we recognize, but theatrical or sports events are also basic needs. Therefore governments should allocate resources for both these things.
پاراگراف نتیجه گیری یا conclusion شامل دو جمله میباشد که در اولی نویسنده به اهمیت موضوع پرداخته و در دومی نظر خود اعلام میکند ولی متاسفانه کلمات را دوباره را تکرار میکند و قادر به paraphrase کردن جملات نیست.